Unprocessed

It looks old and mysterious. A small, dark disk, with spiral patterns.

Insignificant aide (also known as Ia, curses unto her and her ignorant lot): "Ooooh! It must be old"

M (Also known as Dr. T, Praise be unto him and his divine seed): "How do you know?"

Ia: "God must have created it"

M: "God is great. He does not have to create anything"
Ia: "But she must have created it because she wanted to, not because she needed to"
M: "God is great. He has no gender"
Ia: "All right. It must have created it, then"
M: "..."
Ia: "Can we eat it now?"
M: "God cannot be eaten"
Ia: "How do you know so much about God?"
M: "It says so in The Book"
Ia: "Oh."

Long pause.

Ia: "Look, theres a book"
M: "Its not The Book"
Ia: "Who wrote The Book?"
M: "Nobody"
Ia: "Is it a printed book, then?"
M: "Yes"
Ia: "Does it have sharp corners?"
M: "God does not have corners"
Ia: "What do we chew on, then?"

Longer pause.

Ia: "Look! Its moving!. Oh no! The window is open!"
M: "God does not... what window!??! Oh F*&%$!!"

The beetle spreads its wings and flies out the window.

Dinner has left the building.

Ia: "Oh well. Hey, theres another small, old looking thing! Ooooh! It must be old. God must have created it"
M: "God is great. He does not have to create anything"
Ia: "Looks like poop, actually"
M: "What looks like poop?"
Ia: "That thing. over there"
M: "God does not create poop"
Ia: "Why not? does it not eat?"

Kettle starts to whistle.

M and Ia run for cover.

M: "Phew! Must've been the devil's handiwork"
Ia: "Must have"

Long pause.

Ia: "Ooooh!...Look."